Let's compare, shall we? A normal morning versus this morning.
On a normal morning, I wake up at 5:26, shower, dress, make a pot of coffee, drink a cup and eat a piece of toast. Pack up the rest of the coffee, plus lunch, and head out for work at 6:18. I get to the boat around 6:42, and take my time opening things up. Usually I'm across the river and unlocking that gate by 6:55.
Now, this morning:
Wake up at 6:30. Think the clock said 5:30, and don't realize it was later until I've got one foot in the shower (literally). Start the litany of "oh my god, oh my f*ck! OH MY GOD!" as I throw on whatever clothes are on the floor. Leave the house at 6:37, having thrown every knitting project on the couch, my iPad, and the fixings for one cup of coffee into my backpack. Drive like a bat out of hell and show up at the boat at 6:54. Run down the ramp, unlocking the gate and boat, and call dispatch at 6:58, to tell them I'm here. Race across the river and unlock the other gate at 7:05. Then try to breathe.
So here I am, actually on time. I had one cup of coffee thanks to the ingenious insulated mug/French press my mom got me that I hadn't used until now. Then I discovered that the boss had forgotten to take the coffee maker with him, and had left coffee, too. And while folgers really isn't the best part of waking up, it's coffee and now I've probably had too much. I had breakfast fixings on the boat, but nothing for lunch. So my sweet mom, who called me while I was driving down here (cause she's got ESP like that), said she'd bring me lunch and coffee. Awwwww.
So now I just look like crap. You might not know this about me--or want to know--but I've got really REALLY oily skin. Makes my hair oily too. In fact, one time, when we were camping--and you're supposed to be grungy--my loving sister commented that my hair was so greasy you could fry chicken in it! (and Sarah, I don't hold it against you, I think it's one of the funniest things I've ever heard, plus it's true.) So here I sit on the boat, over caffeinated, nothing for lunch, but grimy and sleepy and oily. Loooooooovely. I'm so glad it's Friday!
Oh, and yesterday morning? I found a roach in the toilet on the boat. *shudders*
You are so funny! Oil is what the world runs on right? And its what makes people rich right? So find your richness in your beautifully oily skin and hair (which for the uneducated) is only oily if she doesn't wash it everyday. You remain a lovely and wonderful daughter and we love you.
ReplyDeleteJust came across this interesting information the same day I read your blog:
ReplyDeleteThe scalp is a grease bath where yeasts immerse themselves in sebaceous fat and gorge on dandruff flakes. (Mr. Bloomfield's Orchard, Nicholas Money)
So true!